How Do You Handle Your Emotions?

Do you ever feel like life is crashing down upon your head?

Everything thing that can happen – does!

I’ve had a month of that which is why I  have been away.  But being around others experiencing the same crashes got me to thinking about how differently people handle the same situation.

Some people fall apart.  Others are stoic and you feel they have no emotion.  Then there are those in between – you know they are upset but they are able to handle it.  And also, you have the ones who have to “hold it together” in order to support those who are falling apart.

Which one are you?

My 43 year old nephew recently died, quite unexpectedly.  I became the person who held herself together in order to support his mother who, quite understandably, did fall apart.  But in the process of supporting her, I seemed to keep too focused on “what had to be done.”  Now that some time has passed I realize that holding back my grief and crying was not good for me.

So why are we all so different?  Obviously, as is often the case, the answer may lie in our past.  We have all had different experiences and different role models in this area.  Perhaps Jane’s mother was highly emotional so she learned to be the opposite.  Or maybe she had a greater connection to her mother by joining in and experiencing that emotional bond with her mother.

Mary was taught to NEVER show any emotion at a great cost.  Her family was stoic and always presented themselves to the world in an “all is wonderful with our family” picture.

And then there are all of those in between – knowing how to show emotion without losing our emotional balance.  So is this group more “emotionally balanced” than the others?

I think not.  I think we all must do what is comfortable for us.  But we all must allow ourselves the time to grieve.

Until next time – on a happier note!

Jeanene

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